


A Small Bout of Motorphobia

by Legs (InsanityRule)



Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: Anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-25
Updated: 2015-06-25
Packaged: 2018-04-06 01:42:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4203192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsanityRule/pseuds/Legs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared's meltdown was terrifying, but manageable. Nothing to dwell on.</p><p>Except they haven't even left the hotel and it's only getting worse.</p><p>Richard helps Jared overcome his fears</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Small Bout of Motorphobia

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SexuallyMonsterous (Alli_Bialystock)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alli_Bialystock/gifts).



> Somewhat Jarrich Whump for Sexuallymonsterous' bday in two days!

Erlich tosses the cardboard check onto the floor of the hotel room and pumps his fist. “That was amazing! You’re a fucking genius Richard!”

“Well, you guys helped… with all the,” he gestures to the wipe off boards with dick drawings and formulas, “that.”

“And you almost talking about jerking people off on stage.” Gilfoyle flops onto one end of the couch. “One of your better public speaking moments.”

“I still can’t believe that Weissman.” Dinesh claps Richard on the back. “Unbelievable.”

“We’re driving back early tomorrow, and then we’re celebrating hard. Prepare your wills gentlemen. Anyone not downstairs by ten thirty is walking back to the incubator.” Erlich points to each of them once before claiming the bedroom with a working door.

Everyone else starts settling into their beds from last night. Dinesh and Gilfoyle each claim half of the couch, and Richard is on his way to the bedroom he worked in last night when he sees Jared curling up on the floor with his vest already off and slung over one shoulder.

“Jared?” Jared looks up and Richard motions him over with a small wave. Jared looks confused and Richard waves larger. He’s still not getting it. “Get over here.”

“Did you need something? The front desk is probably unavailable but I can go get you a beverage, or maybe food?”

“No, um…” He scratches the back of his head. “This room has a king sized bed and… I mean I can’t use the whole thing.”

“But where will you sleep?”

“Well, I figured we could just share, because um… well you’re looking… tired. And… and we can have enough space and…” And he’s worried about him he looks so haggard. “Yeah.”

“You don’t have to do that. I’m perfectly comfortable on the floor. See, my vest is rather warm and I have a pillow.”

“It’s fine, really. It’s the least I can do.”

And even if it wasn’t okay he can’t let Jared sleep poorly again, not when he’s still not quite back to his normal, awkward self.

Jared lies down on one side and before Richard can ask if he needs another pillow Jared is snoring softly.

~

He gets punched in the stomach and nearly pukes in the bed. And then he’s scared shitless because who the hell is attacking him in his bed? And then he starts to wake up and sees Jared thrashing around until he tips off the other side of the bed with a small cry.

Well that’s no good.

Richard rolls over to the other side of the bed, feels like an idiot for barrel rolling across the mattress instead of crawling like a normal person, and promptly ignores his petty problems when he finds Jared wide eyed and shaking visibly on the gross (Okay it’s not that gross it’s a decent room but it’s still the floor.) hotel carpet, clear as day with the bathroom light on. Did he leave that on? Maybe. Jared whines and his eyes watering and this is reaching whole new levels of crap.

He reaches out a hand to Jared and his chest feels tight when Jared flinches. Then Jared latches on and presses Richard’s hand to his forehead. And he cries. It’s silent, Richard can’t even hear him breathing. Honestly he might just be holding his breath, hoping he’ll be quiet. Richard’s been there before, having to cry is bad enough, but trying to do it quietly is damn near impossible.

Jared tries to take a deep breath but it catches and he coughs and crying is so gross but he doesn’t try to get Jared to stop this time. Richard isn’t near awake enough to say anything coherent, let alone helpful. He just lets Jared squeeze his hand and cry.

He makes a point not to ask, but Jared is surprisingly forthcoming in the middle of the night while they’re sharing a hotel bed. Jared describes the island, not in a lot of detail, but about how nerve wracking it is to only find robots at every turn. How Jared was very hungry and cold but he found some granola bars and soymilk in a crate after a day. How he slept in a small alcove with the few towels and blankets he could find made into a nest.

How the last couple nights he couldn’t sleep at all because a forklift nearly ran him over while he was sleeping.

And how he hasn’t slept since he got back, excluding his crash after the whole dick stroking brainstorm finished up with one last variable.

“I didn’t last night, I assume I was too tired, but tonight I was having a bad dream.”

“That’s…” Really it’s understandable but he wants to say something encouraging, “it’s probably normal. Could… could keep happening.”

And what part of that was supposed to be encouraging?

“Um, fuck, Jared,” he rubs his eyes; he is not awake enough for this, “that’s… I mean I’m not going to lie but…”

“I understand, Richard. I’m not unfamiliar with having bad dreams.”

Well this took a turn he didn’t expect.

“Oh well that’s… I’m sorry?”

“Bad dreams happen sometimes, Richard. It’s nothing you need to apologise for.”

“No I um… I guess I don’t have them too often? Sometimes, sure. But not, not like, every day or um, night I guess. Not every night.”

“That’s very fortunate. I’m glad we don’t share the same sleep issues.”

“Yo…” Richard leans up on his elbow. “Do you…?”

“I’m sorry Richard, but could we just go back to sleep?”

He wants to know more so badly, but it is the middle of the night, Erlich wants them all to party tomorrow, and Jared still looks so exhausted. Richard scoots back so Jared can climb back into bed.

Richard had been sleeping well before Jared woke him up.

He wakes up three times more to robots and anxiety and Jared tossing in his sleep.

~

It’s always interesting to wake up before someone else when you’re sharing a bed.

Richard still feels tired. He’s not too surprised. It’s just a relief that Erlich is planning on driving and sleeps like a baby.

Jared is, thankfully, still asleep when Richard decides trying to fall asleep again is a lost cause. Even though they’re on a king sized bed and there’s plenty of room for the both of them Jared is sleeping curled up in a little ball. It doesn’t look terribly comfortable. 

It’s probably creepy to watch someone sleep. He should really get out of bed and try to look human. 

Okay he’s been watching Jared sleep for at least ten minutes something is wrong with him.

Well not… not wrong with him he’s not contemplating killing him or something he’s just…

Jared looks really peaceful when he’s sleeping.

At least he did oh shit what’s happening? He didn’t know people cried in their sleep what? What do… what should he do?

Sleep crying is different because Richard doesn’t know what Jared is going to do if he tries to help? He already punched Richard in the stomach earlier, he’s starting to bruise but he’ll never tell Jared.

Fuck it. He reaches out a hand, the other still protecting his stomach because he’s not a complete idiot, and touches Jared’s shoulder. Jared spasms, opens his eyes, but he’s not all there. His pupils are huge and he’s breathing shallow and when he pulls Richard into a hug there isn’t anything he can do but wait for him to calm down.

“So um… Jared?” No response, not even a hum. “Um, Jared?”

And, as if he’d never woken up in the first place, Jared continues to sleep peacefully.

~

Richard doesn’t let himself fall back to sleep but he does let Jared sleep basically on top of him for another hour. He hates having to wake Jared at ten, but Erlich wouldn’t hesitate to leave any of them behind, especially Jared. He wouldn’t be surprised if he decided to leave earlier just so he could leave Jared.

If he’s embarrassed about the cuddling Jared doesn’t say, in fact he barely says a word as Richard coaxes him to get dressed and brush his teeth. He is however, very docile and more than willing to follow Richard’s instructions until they’re standing in the lobby.

~

“For God’s sake Jared just get in the damn car.”

Jared stares at Erlich like he told him to fuck a cactus. He shrinks away from Erlich and looks at both open seats, shotgun and behind shotgun, a few times before turning to Richard with a hopeless look on his face.

“Richard if he’s not in the car by the time I’m back with coffee we’re leaving.”

“Sure, fine.” Richard makes a face at Erlich’s back. “So uh… what’s up Jared?”

“Well,” he takes a deep breath, “ever since the island incident I’ve been a bit nervous inside motor vehicles when I’m not in the driver’s seat.”

“But you made it up here fine.”

Jared looks unsure and Richard is beginning to wonder just how much distress Jared was hiding on the way to TechCrunch. And after he shared last night, and cried twice, Richard is beginning to worry (With the small part of him not dedicated to Pied Piper and public speaking and losing his company) about how well Jared is handling his newfound fear of cars.

“Maybe the front will be better? And… and Erlich is a good driver. He knows where we’re going. So… get in. Please?”

He looks very unhappy but Jared gets into the passenger seat. If Erlich is unhappy with the arrangement, and he probably is, he doesn’t say anything. He just selects his music and puts on some shades and starts their drive back to the incubator.

The first half hour is fine. Richard watches Dinesh and Gilfoyle argue over him; he really hates the middle seat but it would be worse if they were right beside each other. Erlich is still riding at least some of the high and is telling Richard about all the tail he’ll be getting now that he’s a successful CEO. It’s doubtful but still the fact that Erlich is telling him this is rather encouraging for his love life. And Jared has fallen asleep in the passenger seat with his vest folded into a pillow.

But somewhere around the hour mark Jared wakes up from a bad dream, starting and swinging at Erlich and the dash and everything he can reach. Richard’s there, and he doesn’t know what to say but he’s kind of figured out what to do, so he reaches a hand to Jared and Jared holds it to his collarbone until his breathing slows down. No one comments, but the dream has left Jared jittery and anxious. And him being jittery is making Erlich angry and he’s driving more reckless. And the reckless driving is making Jared more jittery and twitchy and nervous. And Erlich is getting angrier-

And then he starts signalling to get off on a random exit and Jared freaks out.

“Erlich? This isn’t our exit right? Richard? Richard has he been taken over!?”

Richard sighs and leans forward. “Erlich what the fuck why are we stopping?”

Erlich slams on the breaks and Jared is sent forward until the seat belt stops him and probably bruises his ribs. They’re in a gas station parking lot and Jared is out of the car and across the pavement in seconds.

“Shit, shit. Jared stop!” Richard clumsily crawls over Gilfoyle and falls out of the car. “Fuck. Jared!”

He runs after Jared but he does not know what he’s supposed to do now. Jared has stopped moving in favor of sitting in the dirt with his knees to his chest and his hands in his hair. Instead of being useful or helpful or at least comforting he just stands there awkwardly watching Jared sit on the ground and pull his hair out.

“So um… maybe you should sit in the back?” Jared starts wheezing. “Oh no. Hey, hey um… don’t… you can sit with me?” Richard grabs Jared’s hands and gently pulls him up off the ground. Jared squeezes his hands so hard Richard has to bite his lip to keep from swearing. He squeezes back and whispers things like ‘I’ll be there’ and ‘we’re safe it’s okay’ until Jared starts to breathe normally again.

Gilfoyle gets out of the car and claims the front seat. Richard isn’t sure if he moved for his own sake or Jared’s but it makes everything a lot easier either way.

Jared is definitely not okay right now. He’s shaking and he absolutely refuses to let go of Richard’s hands. Gilfoyle has turned around to watch this jittery trainwreck, and Richard is too focused on making sure he doesn’t lose a hand to tell him to turn around. It’s a miracle he gets Jared to let go long enough to buckle him in, but once the seatbelt clicks he grabs Richard’s hand again and hides his face against Richard’s shoulder.

It’s probably one of the most emotionally taxing car rides of his life but somehow, someway, they make it back to the incubator in one piece. Erlich turns off the car and enters the house without a word, and it feels like even though they were planning to celebrate the party’s been cancelled on account of their mentally unstable Biz-Dev.

“Richard, kitchen.”

“Erli- um… hey, Jared, can you um… just go sit in my room okay?” Jared nods and walks down the hall. “What do you want Erlich?”

“What the ever loving fuck was that?”

“Um, what?”

“Jared in the fucking car, Richard.” Ah right that was a thing. “I almost ran us off the road!”

“Look he’s… he’s just freaked out and it’s…”

“You’re going to do something about it or he’s out.”

“Out of… what? Like… you can’t fire-”

“He’s not welcome in this home until he’s not crazy.”

“Well I’m not making him… he’ll stay in my room okay?”

“He better.”

“Great. Nice talk.” He huffs. He has a crazy Biz-Dev in his room to deal with.

Jared’s standing in the center of his bedroom chewing on his knuckles. “Oh, hello.” He shoves his hands in his jacket. “Richard, would it be too forward if I slept in here?”

“Oh um… what?”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry that was too forward. I’ll sleep… there’s a couch, or I’ll use one of the lawn chairs-”

“Hey, hey Jared it’s…” Richard lets Jared grab his hands again. One of his knuckles pops. “You’re - fuck - okay. “You can… you can use my bed.”

Jared looks so relieved, or happy, or a little like he’s going to cry? Maybe all three. Richard helps Jared get up the ladder and talks nonsense about the party they should have once Jared’s feeling better, watching as Jared blinks slower and slower until eventually his eyes stay shut.

And when it’s late and he can’t convince Dinesh and Gilfoyle to stop playing on the XBox so he can sleep on a couch he does the only logical thing; (Well maybe not logical but still the best thing he could come up with.) he crawls up beside Jared and sleeps better than he has in months.


End file.
